The wedding day is a one-time event that most girls dream of from a very young age and there are moments, as we grow up and begin to appreciate certain things, we personalize these moments and to have a deeper meaning. Coupled with the festivities of the big day which often include song, dance and immense joy, there are those profound and emotional moments that mark a special step in life. For our bride Ruth as seen on my dream wedding, there were particular moments that carried the day and were all profound and with deep meaning.
Morning of the wedding: This is the time when there is a beehive of activities as the bride and bridesmaids get ready for the big day. The aunties and relatives stream in and the song and dance begins. This is the time that it dawns on most brides that they are actually getting married. The mother of the bride gives a word of advice to her daughter and after a prayer; it is time to get married.
Drive to the venue: For Ruth, she wanted her dad to drive her to the church but her aunties were not for it because according to traditions the groom’s family should pick the bride and take her to the church. His words “I will drive you to church,and then I will walk you down the aisle.” This is also a very emotional and mixed feeling for the father of the bride since he has to give away his daughter to another man.
Walk down the aisle: This is an emotional moment for the bride, as everything finally comes to this moment. Many things go through the bride’s mind as she walks down the aisle. From seeing your friends all gathered waiting to witness your union to the man of your dreams standing in wait for you at the altar; “I look up and I see Nelson and that whole set up, I can’t contain it” (she breaks down while walking down the aisle) she says.
The vows: These are the promises you make to each other and to God in front of family and friends. You apply these vows day to day in your marriage and live by every word. Some couples choose to say personalized vows but realize that after saying them, they actually forget them even though they meant every word at that moment. The standard vows can be incorporated to ensure that you don’t forget the promise you made and that you are accountable.
The kiss: In history, this part was considered as what sealed the deal. But over the years, this has changed since some brides are embarrassed of kissing in front of parents, grandparents and children. Some will choose to hug instead, while others chose not to do it. Ruth was dreading this moment and was hoping that after the vows, the priest would tell them to sit down, but this was not the case. She could hardly look up. She thought of her parents’ presence the grandparents and the little kids.
Father daughter dance: This was the most profound moment of the day. One of the things Ruth wanted to do on her wedding day was dance with her father. “For me, it was because my father established a thin line between being a father and a friend growing up” says Ruth.
First night: The first night is supposed to be a magical time full of soft light, lace, lingerie and sex that feels different somehow now that you’re married, so how different is it for the first night? For Ruth, the first night was really special. She says, “There is a reason why sex is built for marriage and not outside and I understood that, that night.”